Why is Trader Joe’s Indian food so good?

So often during sheltering in place, only the bright red floral shirts of Trader Joe’s staff broke up the monotony of my pandemic funk. The usual 30 minute wait was enough time to salivate in anticipation over the array of goodies such as dark chocolate peanut butter cups, dried mangos, and the shrimp fried rice. It gave me a moment to ponder which tasty spread, from the garlic hummus to kale-based pesto, I was likely to overpay for. Who could overlook their bevy of beverages such as their golden milk, their gingerbread coffee, or their growing selection of kombucha?

Aside from buying enough food (and liquor) to get us through quarantine, my top priority was perusing Trader Joe’s expansive Indian offerings.

But one fall afternoon, on a search for my favorite South Asian eats, my world was turned upside down. I weaved past the crowds of Karens and skipped over the not-so fresh produce, bristled at the untouched chocolate hummus piling up, and passed by 1,800 bread options, I finally came to my beloved Desi bites frozen food section. Only to find it fully filled with spicy pumpkin samosas.

This sight of this culinary war crime hit me hard. I finally understood how Italians felt when they saw pineapple on pizza.

My disappointment was not rooted in any offense taken nor qualms about cultural…